We are divine by creation but we are placed in a human world. IHood is the unique guidance system used to find our ultimate reason for living. It is the interpreter of the present moment in time, the translator of past experiences, and the acknowledger of expectations of the future. It keeps us in touch with the Light in its consciousness; otherwise we would forever be in identity crisis, always identifying with self-serving accomplishments of this world. We would live with short-term, feel-good solutions rather than those which may take a life-time to reach and benefit humankind.
Identity crisis is a term commonly used today, describing the time of intense self-examination to discover different ways of looking at ourselves. In fact, identity crisis is the state in which we find ourselves when we don’t know who we are in this world. We are not mature enough to awaken to our spiritual presence. Once we are sufficiently cognizant of love that is other than selfish love, we become open to our divine spirit.
We have to grow up physically and emotionally, and grow ‘into’ our spiritually, which has always been there waiting for us. We have to overcome the temptations of being an ego-filled human.
Ego keeps us in an ‘unconscious’ state as we ‘react’ to our world.
How many of us marry or gain a partner that we want by becoming what we think the future partner is looking for, rather than being the genuine person that we are in truth? It soon becomes difficult if not impossible to keep up the charade of this mask we have invented to be appealing and loveable to the partner. We can recognize the destruction in this scenario, for both parties will ultimately suffer, even though the ego got what it wanted. The true spirit is denied.
We need to let go of ego and listen to truth-spirit, respecting and allowing other’s right to be in control, and to allow others to make mistakes. We all need to discover our own frailties, knowing that by stumbling we strengthen our legs for the next climb. Our IHood can evoke the art of becoming an observer as we evolve. By staying quiet and watchful, acknowledging spirit’s truth, we gain wisdom.
A successful practice for those of us hell-bent on correcting and controlling people around us is to begin to pick the battles that we have in our life; otherwise we will live a life filled with cat fights and emotional bruises. When we don’t get ‘our way’, or are met with resistance, we may be wise to stand aside. IHood recognizes, eventually, that the ego doesn’t have all the answers but it does have lots of energy to create them. It is pointless to spend time brooding over ‘others’ imperfections and practicing to defend our reasons we hold for the next ‘I’m in charge’ moment. It is a time waster and a gut wrenching practice for all parties involved. It only produces chaos for us and those around us.
Control-freak behavior is not always obvious to us.
To check, ask ourselves the question, “How many times have I told my wife (husband): “Watch out for that car! or, You’re going too fast!” How many parents have badgered their child for the smallest infraction? For example, “Get your elbows off the table and sit up straight. When will it stick in that thick skull of yours?” There will be a point that the child ‘turns them off’. Sometimes it’s okay to just look the other way. Yes, manners are important, but have faith that our children will eventually surprise us when we least expect it! My mother use to say, “Don’t worry, your son won’t slurp his soup by the time he’s in college.” She was right.
In the pursuit of spiritual domination for our IHood, it is important to do self-examination in regard to our effort to control others and the world in general.
Because we falsely believed that we were in control in our younger years, we strive to gain or regain more of that control as we get older. The taste of power over others is addictive. The problems arise when we try to reign over others in making decisions for them that are rightfully theirs to make. We rationalize our egoic behavior toward others by convincing ourselves that ‘other’ doesn’t have the experience needed to make such decisions, thus opening up the possibility that they may make the wrong decision (unlike us, who make the right decision always). Those of us consumed with this activity have perhaps heard themselves referred to as a ‘control freak’. If this sounds familiar, remember, this behavior pattern of ego is not really ‘for the good’ of other; it is for the hope of the destruction of what we don’t want in the other. We wish to continue to view other as incompetent or inexperienced, not as capable.
Motivation is often seen as the energy force that is filled because of ‘lack.’ This may change as we truly recognize what we already have. As we develop our abilities and talents, we find personal growth and fulfillment in our achievements, satisfying both ego and spirit. When we are motivated to use our gifts to the maximum – with humility and without thought of self, it is a win-win situation for us and the path we seek.
Remember, the ultimate question we can ask ourselves when we are unsure of the choice to make, is:
“Will I serve my own interests or will I serve someone else?”
If the answer is to serve self, it is the Ego dominating.